Thursday, July 31, 2014

There is No Wrong Way to Have a Baby

I had a natural, home birth for my first baby.  I can feel the tension in the air even as I type that.  Keep reading!  We crunchy natural-birthing mammas have gained a merited reputation for trampling all other methods in a loud stampede of medical-bashing-water-birthing-doula-hyping self righteousness.  So, I feel the need to state the obvious.  There is no wrong way to have a baby!

We are all different.  Wow, I know, that's not exactly the most original idea, but hear me out.  Every potential mother has a completely different view on the role of medicine, a wildly oscillating confidence level in doctors, and differing comfort level in a home or hospital setting.  Not to mention each father-to-be brings a whole host of expectations, desires, and opinions.  This combination of needs alone means there can't possibly be a single method that trumps all others every time. 

Add to the mix the complexities of varying physical and mental factors.  I was talking to a neighbor just the other day about her birthing experiences.  Her hips don't widen far enough to release her babies.  If she were a pioneer giving birth she would have died!  C-sections have been the gift that made it possible for her to be a living mother to three beautiful daughters.   

I have another friend who is completely open to the idea of natural birthing.  However, out of love and respect for her husband, she hasn't seriously entertained the idea.  His stress level associated with watching his wife in pain and slight OCD tendencies are strong enough that her interest in having him as a present, loving, comfortable supporter of the birthing experience outweighs her desire to go unmedicated.

The process of conception, pregnancy, and life are all MIRACLES.  Each one is impossible to understand.  The hours that span the time when a baby transitions from complete dependence on his mother's body to the open air, beauty, and struggles of life on this earth are a miracle, how ever that magic happens.  The far more impactful moments will happen as life continues.  What will that child be taught?  Will he be loved?  Will he know that he is wonderful? 

I haven't shared my birth story on this blog because it was amazing.  Not every birth is as peaceful as mine was.  I felt prepared, educated, in control.  Part of that came from my efforts, but most of it was chance.  A healthy baby to a healthy mommy who inherited good birthing hips, no complications, no transport.  That was mainly dumb luck.   I guess I kind of want to share that story. With this preface maybe I'll feel safe to.

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Reflecting: Almost 15 Months of Motherhood

"James can you go get your toothbrush and bring it to mommy?"  2 minutes later it's in my hand. 


Can we just take a moment to bask in the glory of this accomplishment.  James heard the question, broke down both parts: go get and bring back.  Made the connection between the word toothbrush and his actual little ABC green toothbrush.  Not only that, he decided to obey the request and actually retrieved the item and brought it to me.  

Our brains are amazing!  How does this happen?  He is learning rapid fire these day.  Really that has been going on since the first moments he entered this world, probably even before then, but lately there is a new discovery or accomplishment every day!  

I love watching his little tongue and lips struggling to mimic words: toast (ta, tut, toos, then finally tooost.)  

Now for the past week he has been super sick.  There was a point where I wanted to cry because my darling little fireball was so listless and miserable.  I learned that a snugly baby has just as many pros and cons as an crazy-get-into-everything baby.  In fact, I do believe being sick has taught him what snuggling is!  Because you'd better believe he did NOT knew what it was before.  I'm even hopeful that he might remember what it's like to sit through a whole picture book.  I won't get my hopes up though.  

Today my happy boy is back in action!  

Maybe we will go to the splash pad today.  Or color some pictures, maybe a library trip?  My world is changing guys.  I'm starting to keep my eyes open for free kids adventures and dress up for free food stuff.  Every phase of this parenting thing has been so hard and so fun.  I'm so grateful for the ride! 

Oh look everyone!